Take in strays

As a grown up, I realize that through the course of life I have learned many valuable lessons. Some of them were taught to me by my mom and dad. Some of them I learned in school and through experience. Many of them were taught to me by my aunts. Now, I am an aunt and my oldest niece recently started kindergarten. I know that they say everything you need to know you learn in kindergarten. I disagree. I believe that there are some things that one cannot learn in a classroom. These are lessons that can only be learned by living. So, here it is. A year's worth of tiny words of wisdom for all of the nieces out there, or really anyone who will listen. They may not work for everybody and you may not agree with all of them, but each is a rule that I either try to live by or wish I did.

# 34 Take in strays... pets and people

When I was three years old, our neighbors across the street had an old animal cage that they put out for the garbage men. We had some other neighbors who had fifteen dogs. In the middle of the night, I remember the entire neighborhood waking up to horrible sounds of dogs whining and screeching. Those horrible people had put all of their dogs into this tiny cage and left town. My entire household met in the hallway and my mom put on her housecoat and went outside. I watched from the front porch as people walked with beautiful dogs. Some of them were purebred, and some of them were soft and cuddly. I watched as my mom just stood back and let everyone leave.
"Daddy, why doesn't she take one?," I asked.
"She's waiting for the right one," he told me.
I didn't understand and I sat there waiting not so patiently. Finally my mom was the only one left standing in front of that animal cage. She opened it and gently pulled out the ugliest puppy that any of us had ever seen.
My mom waited because she knew that there would be one dog, possibly two, that no one would take home with them. She brought him home and my brother decided that since he was so pathetic, he needed a tough name.
Killer was one of the best dogs that ever walked the earth. He lived to be almost 18. He loved the snow and he LOVED a good good sick day. He loved chocolate covered cherries and would only drink water out of a cup. He was a stray and my mom gave him a chance.
She gave a lot of people a chance too.
When my sister and I were both in the tenth grade, (not at the same time), there was a boy in each of our classes who never brought a lunch, and never had money to buy one. My mom made both of those boys lunch for an entire school year, complete with the same happy face on the sandwich Ziploc, and the encouraging note on the napkin.
In college, it was always understood that if one of my friends or acquaintances couldn't get home for the weekend or a holiday then they would spend it with me and my family. My dad has come home from work many times when there was a stranger sleeping on our couch. He never questioned, he just waved or went about his way.
Sometimes you just have to give people, and animals the time of day. They might not have anyone in the world who is nice to them until you come along.
My parents now have a new dog, Saffron. Saffron is purebred Weimaraner who my cousin found eating out of a dumpster. He knew that as soon as my parent met her, she would have a home. It also didn't hurt that I happened to be home that day.
Take in strays, you never know how much joy they can bring to your life until you give it a shot.
Recommended reading: A Dog's Life: Autobiography of a Stray by Ann M. Martin
(A DOG'S LIFE) THE AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF A STRAY BY Martin, Ann M.(Author)Paperback{A Dog's Life: The Autobiography of a Stray}

If you have to go... go

As a grown up, I realize that I have learned many valuable lessons through the course of life. Some of them were taught to me by my mom and dad. Some of them I learned in school and through expereince. Many of them were taught to me by my Aunts. Now, I am an aunt and my oldest niece recently started kindergarten. I know that they say everything you need to know you learn in kindergarten. I disagree. I believe that there are some things that one cannot learn in a classroom. These are lessons that can only be learned from living. So, here it is. A year's worth of advice for all of the nieces and nephews out there, or really for anyone who will listen. They may not work for everybody and you may not agree with all of them, but each is a rule that I either try to live by or wish I did.

# 13 If you have to go to the bathroom, get up and go.

When I was in the third grade, I wet my pants at school. It was within the last 45 minutes of the day and I asked my teacher to let me go to the bathroom. She told me to hold it, that she knew I could wait just a few more minutes. A few minutes later, I asked her again and she told me again, more firmly that I needed to sit down and wait.
Let me just insert here that I HATED my third grade teacher. My mom HATED her too.
So, moving on. I still remember what I was wearing, though that doesn't matter now. I wet my pants and my horrible excuse for a teacher told me that I did it on purpose just to get attention, and would NOT let me leave the room until the bell rang.
One of my friends gave me her jacket to tie around my waste and walked me to my mom's car as I cried my eyes out.
My mom took one look at me, asked me what happened, and my friend told her. She grabbed my hand, marched me back into the school principal's office and demanded to speak to my teacher. My teacher finally waddled into the office and my mom said words that I know I was never supposed to hear. She told my teacher that from this moment on, If I had to go to the bathroom, I would not ask. I would get up in the middle of whatever was going on, and I would go. PERIOD!
For the rest of my school career and even into adulthood, I have carried this advice with me.
It is our God given right to be able to go to the bathroom. If anyone tells you that you can't, who cares. How dare anyone try to judge when someone else's bladder is full. You know when you need to pee... so just get up and go.

Lunch is for companionship

As a grown up, I realize that through the course of life I have learned many valuable lessons. Some of them were taught to me by my mom and dad. Some I learned in school and through expereince. Many of them I learned from my aunts. Now, I am an aunt and my oldest niece recently started kindergarten. I know that they say everything you need to know you learn in kindergarten. I disagree. I believe that there are many things that one cannot learn in a classroom. These are lessons that can only be learned by living. So here it is. A year's worth of tiny words of wisdom for all of the nieces and nephews out there, or really for anyone who will listen. They may not work for everyone and you may not agree with all of them, but each one is a rule that I either try to live by or wish I did.

#12 Don't let anyone sit alone at a lunch table

Before my first day of school, every year, my mom would say: "Shanna, you make friends very easily, but some people don't. If you see someone sitting alone at lunch, ask them to join you. Or go and sit with them."
In elementary school, this was never really an issue, because we sat at long picnic like tables that folded in the middle. Boys at one and girls at another. No one really had the opportunity to be left out, so I never really understood.
However, on the first day of middle school, I got it. I thanked God that I had some of my friends from the 6th grade there when it came time for lunch. I walked into the cafeteria and I was completely overwhelmed. I had two of my friends with me, and we were trying to decide where to sit. Should we try to sit with the cheerleaders, even though we didn't make the squad? Should we sit with the "nerds" who were reading books and not talking to one another? Should we sit with the eccentric "theater kids" who were dressed in black and asking one another for a location?
Finally my mother's words popped into my head. I made the decision. I said, "today seems like a good day to make new friends."
We found a table with one girl sitting at it alone. We asked if we could join her. She said something to the effect of sure, if you really want to. We assured her that we did and by the end of lunch on the first day of 7th grade, four other people had asked us if they could join us and our lunch table was one of the more full ones. I specifically remember that the main thing I looked forward to during the first semester of 7th grade was lunch. I made some really good friends that year. Anytime that someone new came in, or was sitting alone, there was a space for them in our lunch group.
You all have to be there, and really you're all in the same boat. No one should have to endure it alone. Don't let anybody sit alone at a lunch table, because you wouldn't want to. Also, it would break your heart to know that your children or nieces and nephews were sitting alone during lunch.

Kindergarten is not a scary place...

As a grown up, I realize that in the course of life I have learned many valuable lessons. Some of them were taught to me by my mom and dad. Some of them I learned in school and through experience. many of them were taught to me by my aunts. Now, I am an aunt and my oldest niece recently started kindergarten. I know that they say everything you need to know, you learn in kindergarten. I disagree. I believe that there are many things that one cannot learn in a classroom. These are lessons that can only be learned by living. So, here it is. A year's worth of tiny words of wisdom for all of the nieces and nephews in the world, or really for anyone who will listen. They may not work for everybody and you may not agree with all of them, but each one is a rule that I either try to live by or wish I did.

# 9 Kindergarten is not a scary place

I found out today that my precious niece is having quite the hard time adjusting to this whole kindergarten thing. She has nervous stomach anyway, and this kindergarten thing is really getting to her. She works herself into a frenzy and just gets so nervous and emotional about it that some days, she just can't physically do it. Go to kindergarten, I mean.
I understand that there are so many things that can be scary to a five year old, in new place, who has to wear a plaid jumper everyday. She is terrified of fire drills, which I get. The thought of fire is horrific. However, as a grown up, I realize that with every good fire drill, occasionally you get some really hot fireman.
Maybe she is scared of messing up or doing something wrong. Perhaps she is afraid to color outside of the lines. As a grown up, I realize that coloring outside the lines isn't always a bad thing.
She could also very well be afraid of the upcoming musical in which she has to play a sheep. It was the kindergarten Christmas pageant, when I wore the tinsel icicle costume that my mom slaved over. I hated this costume until I walked on stage and the entire audience "oohed" and "ahhed". From that moment on, I had the acting bug, and it never went away. Thank you kindergarten for causing me to move to NYC.
Maybe she is afraid that she won't make any friends, but one little boy in her class told the teacher that he prayed for her and hoped she would be his girlfriend. Maybe she is afraid she WILL make friends.
I don't remember being scared of kindergarten. My mom stayed home with me and we had crafts, and storytime, and naptime, and snacks. I'm fairly certain that I went into it thinking it would just be my daily activities, but with more people and in a different setting.
To this day, I don't still speak to a single person that I went to kindergarten with. However, I do remember that I learned to tie my shoe, count to 100, read on a second grade level, make butter in a jar, and I found the passion that I have taken with me everywhere I go. That is passion is what motivates me to get up in the mornings, and scour the audition notices.
Kindergarten isn't scary, it is a wonderful place for learning, and having adventures, and growing. If you can survive it, you are well on your way to at least being a well rounded first grader.

Recommended reading: The Night Before Kindergarten Reading Railroad Series
The Night Before Kindergarten (Reading Railroad Books Series)